Today's Aquarius Horoscope:

May 14, 2009

Nobody's perfect, dear Aquarius, so there's no sense in trying to be. Even if you feel that something is pushing you to perfect certain aspects of your love life at the moment, remind yourself that sometimes doing too much can be as damaging as doing too little. It isn't necessary to have an overcharged schedule. Try and slow down the pace a bit, dear Aquarius. Your mind and body do have their limits.

ha ha

it's a little late ...

But here is the Easter message from the LDS church. Remember we are NOT alone.

"One of the great consolations of this Easter season is that because Jesus walked such a long, lonely path utterly alone, we do not have to do so."
- Jeffrey R. Holland

What do you do when you are caught wasting company time.

You say you have to stop to participate in a religious practice. That way they can’t do anything with violating your human rights. LOL!
You can tell them that you were working and then when they complain about the time. You swear that you were working and as they persist you get concerned. Then as you contemplate what is going on you have two options. 1. Claim you were abducted again by aliens. 2. Claim some horrible brain tumor, or disease. Then before they can say anything else bust into tears screaming “why!”
How about you claim gremlins came and destroyed your work so you had to start over.
You could claim that the voices in you head took a vote and you all agree, “work is stupid and so are you.” Then turn around and continue what you were doing.
You can pull the fire alarm and then that makes it so you don’t have to work and no one cares because you are all outside. If you get caught you just turn and look very angry and say it was your evil twin out to ruin you.
There is always the route of when called about the hours insist that you have a computer problem and it doesn’t work right. Insist that they come take a look then have them monkey with your computer. Have them wait there while you take a cup and go get a glass of water. When you return and they tell you it is working fine. Pour the water inside the computer. Then say “It sure looks like it’s got a problem to me.”
My personal favorite is when management comes to complain about the time. You say you are doing fine. When they question you again you put your arm around them and very quietly tell them that you are very strongly connected to the mob. That you would hate to have this incident ruin your professional relation ship. Then point your finger like a gun and wink at them as you send them back to there office. Then arrange for little accident to happen to them through the week. Making sure you are always there to point out how horrible that was. Of course having a solid alibi the whole time.
I forgot about the one where you bring your desk orgier to work and when they come to give you a hard time you hit them over the head knocking them unconscious. Then you feed them to desk orger. And no one is the wiser. Make sure you give the club you used to the orger as well for him to eat.

March Madness

Well March madness has begun here at work. For the first time ever I filled out a Bracket. Now I know that my pick for winning the whole thing is a stretch, but you got to stick with you team win or lose. Anyway, I Picked U of U as the big winner. I won’t bore you with the rest of the details unless someone asks. It’s been really entertaining to have all the guys give me a hard time about my chooses, but having never cared before I think I have done ok. Besides I really don’t care about the Prize at the end. One of my bosses family all fill out brackets. The winner gets $50, and a big trophy with a basketball player on it. They keep the trophy till next year. It’s funny because my dad loves sports, but March Madness wasn’t a big deal. I remember A woman I dated She and her family got so excited this time of year. There were fights and hard feelings about games. Wins and loses were such a huge deal. I would just laugh and make fun of them. Anyway, to everyone out there who cares may the best team win. LOL!

HAPPY 3/16 DAY!

HAPPY 316 DAY TO THE PEOPLE THT KNOWS WHAT IT MEANS